Alexithymia and Everyday Interpersonal Emotion Regulation

Alexithymia, a personality trait marked by difficulties identifying and describing feelings and an externally oriented thinking style, is frequently linked to interpersonal problems and psychopathology. Drawing on the extended process model of interpersonal emotion regulation (IER), we conducted two ecological momentary assessment studies in Germany (N = 128) and in the United States (N = 220) to examine how alexithymia shapes processes of responding to others’ emotions, a potential mechanism underlying social difficulties. Across 5,552 reported social interactions, alexithymia and its dimensions were associated with less emotionally attuned and more emotionally distant IER goals and strategies. Notably, cultural and sample differences emerged, suggesting context may modulate observed associations. In Study 1 (Germany), higher overall alexithymia and externally oriented thinking were linked to disengagement from others’ emotions. In Study 2 (U.S.), alexithymia predicted greater use of counter-hedonic goals and problem-focused strategies along with reduced use of relationship-oriented strategies such as validation and soothing. Disengagement and engagement tendencies varied across alexithymia dimensions and cultural contexts, but both studies indicated a consistent pattern of reduced emotional attunement in IER. These findings extend existing research by showing that alexithymia not only affects self-regulation but also significantly shapes how individuals respond to others’ emotions. IER difficulties may represent a key mechanism linking alexithymia to interpersonal problems and psychopathology. Interventions may benefit from explicitly targeting IER skills, particularly by promoting hedonic regulation goals and relationship-oriented strategies.